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Mario vs Fate! battle of the 2 villain kings who kidnap girls! Fist vs Sword! BTW I don't have any idea what is weirder, Bowser kidnapping Peach and tying her up and the game still being rated E or, Gilgamesh being refered to as "The King of Heroes." Even when he is a villain.

Technical Difficulties.

InterludeEdit

Hyper Anon:Kings. A lot of characters are kings.

Doge:Some Kings are assholes like Bowser the king of koopas

Spongebob:And Gilgamesh the first king

Doge:I'm Doge and they are Hyper Anon and Spongebob

Hyper anon:and it's our job to analyze their weapons armor and skills to find out who would win a death battle.

BowserEdit

Hyper Anon:Bowser is one of the star children

Doge:and a turtle..........

Spongebob :Ever since he was a kid Bowser had a castle and grew up evil for some reason because lazy writing

Doge:He even tried to attack Mario who was a baby.....But Yoshi came out and beat the shit out of him.

Hyper Anon:However several years later Bowser became a king and planned to capture a princess names Peach to get her heart power.

Doge:but Mario came and killed Bowser in cold blood and was charged with animal cruelty by the toads who witnessed

Spongebob:That didn't happen! What did was Bowser somehow giving birth to koopalings who used their dark magic to turn toads into brick and stone

Doge:aka the stuff Mario breaks. Mario is a murderer!

Hyper Anon:Eventually Bowser made an army of koopalings and the army attacked the toads multiple times.

Doge:Bowser is hella strong I mean he could practically destroy anything. Like the hulk

Spongebob:He isn't very fast but he makes it up in durability. His shell is almost practically indestructible and can take damage from Mario's powerful attacks.

Doge:Bowser can also breath fire like most turtles. The fire is extremely powerful and is good at cooking good old lettuce.

Hyper Anon:He can also manipulate fire in fire beams and fire balls. Not to mention he can charge up the fire for even bigger fire beams.


Doge:Bowser can smash boulders and lift giant stones not to mention moving freaking islands. He is trained in wrestling, LIKE JOHN CENA!

Spongebob:Bowser has claws perfect for slashing his foes.

Doge:Do turtles have claws?

Hyper Anon:No. Anyway Bowser can create shockwaves with ease just by stomping. He also has throwing hammers.  He can also bite his opponents. And pretty damn hard. Not to mention being able to release poison through his teeth and claws.

Doge:I never knew this stuff until now! Also Bowser can also use dark magic to even freaking teleport and clone himself! Damn still didn't know this shit. Not to mention being able to clone himself. Still don't know this shit. And turn into Meowser. A cat version of Bowser. Definately don't know this shit! Meowser can use his tail to attack his opponents and can clime walls. Not to mention looking so weird you don't wanna mess with it!

Spongebob:Bowser can hide in his shell to avoid damage almost like a shield.

Doge:Isn't it stupid to use yourself as a shield to protect yourself?

Hyper Anon:Bowser has a lot of last resorts. His biggest last resort, litterally is Giga Bowser.

Doge:Holy hell! That thing looks creepy are you sure this game is for kids?

Spongebob:Giga Bowser is a more durable,stronger, and bigger version of Bowser.

Doge:But that's not all Giga Bowser is almost immune to psychical damage and can somehow control elements such as ice and create explosions! Damn these games keep on getting weirder and weirder.

Hyper Anon:But Bowser's true last resort. Is Dry Bowser where he turns into a skelaton allowing him to cheat death. 

Doge:Dry Bowser is nearly indestructable, even though bones are vulnable and can throw bones and summon them, How original. Dry Bowser can also jump pretty high and somehow roar so loud he raises lava. I never knew being a skelaton allowed you to do that.

Spongebob:Bowser has pulled of amazing feats. He can lift statues with ease.

Doge:Hell he is probably as strong as a Kaiju! 

Hyper Anon:Bowser has an extremely high destructive potiental due to his lifting and striking strength and fought Mario multiple times.

Doge:However he isn't perfect because he is damn slow. He makes Jason and Robocop look like Sonic the Hedgehog!

Spongebob:He also loses to Mario a lot and isn't very smart not to mention being very arrogant.

Doge:He also has anger issues and usually rushes in. Like the turtle version of Knuckles, who unlike Sanic doesn't chuckle.

Hyper Anon:But Bowser is a extremely powerfull villain.

Doge:And a good old classic one. I remember when I was a kid I wanted to kick his ass!

GilgameshEdit

Hyper Anon:Gilgamesh is god human hybird born in Uruk.

Doge:Where the hell is Uruk? 

Spongebob:Uruk is a Summerian City in Mesopotatia.

Doge:Since the Summerian times take place in the Stone Age does that mean Gilgamesh is a caveman?

Hyper Anon:No. Gilgamesh is based of off a Summerian King who's name was.....well Gilgamesh. Believe us Gilgamesh doesn't look anything like his Fate version.

Doge:Gilgamesh became the King of Heroes due to his high class! Even though Gilgamesh isn't a hero. 

Spongebob:While Gilgamesh was a king he still was a loner. His only friend was Enkiddu who died to gods.

Doge:So Gilgamesh decided to get immortality for some reason. But failed. He wanted the holy grail to wish he was immortal but had to stick with being a king. What a jerk. I would be happy to be to be a king.

Hyper Anon:Gilgamesh has Golden Armor. Which is Magic Proof.

Doge:And Pretty badass. Gilgamesh can also see faster. GODAMNIT That's not a thing again! Looks like we found another opponent for the epic staring contest between Captain America, Deathstroke and Vaktus.

Spongebob:He is strong enough to trade blows with Saber herself. 

Doge:Gilgamesh has a shitton of weapons. One of his moves are the Gate of Babylon. Wait how did Gilly get to New York?

Hyper Anon:Not that Babylon the Babylon in Mesopotatia! Anyway The Gate of Babylon is where Gilgamesh warps reality summons a bunch of swords at the same time then throws them at you.

Doge:Damn that's gotta hurt.

Spongebob:And those aren't even normal swords. Those are magical swords. A normal human would die if that number of regular swords impaled the person. 

Doge:Gilgamesh doesn't always need swords. He has bows and arrows. Since Gilgamesh is kinda of in the Archer Class. He has a bow and arrow named Vajira which can manipulate electricity he also has Gae Bolg a spear that can kill a human. Cool! He names his weapons like me!

Hyper Anon:Gilgmesh has a bunch of swords. Such as Caladbolg which can manipulate space and makes a killer arrow, Dainsleif the demon sword, Durandal, the sword made of holy powers like most swords from fiction, Gram, basically Gilgamesh's version of Gut's Dragonslayer because it slays dragons, Harpe, the holy scythe which can attack goods and spirits, and basically Sora's Keyblade which he could use as a shield which is ironic since swords and shields are practically the oppossite.

Doge:Some of his swords can manipulate elecricity,ice,and magic proof. But if his fuckton of swords aren't enough he could use Enkidu. Enkidu are chains which can be summoned out of nowhere which can restrain Berserker who is hella hard to kill.

Spongebob:But Gilgamesh's last resort is his giant magic sword Ea.

Doge: This sword can only be used by Gilgamesh so no one could steal it. The sword puts Gilly at his maximum potiental. Ea is so destructive you don't even want to see it.

Hyper Anon:At minimum potiental Gilgamesh can obliterate an entire building with one slash.

Doge:At Maximum(Shiver) The sword can warp time and space and makes Gilly a powerfull reality warper. Not to mention Gilgamesh can practically destroy the Earth he wanted to so we are fucked.  

Spongebob:Gilgamesh has fought power Fate characters such as Saber. Gilgamesh ran faster than Lancer. Lancer can attack so fast he could attack his foes 100 times in 1 seconds.

Doge:Isn't Lancer the dude who keeps dying?

Hyper Anon:Yes anyway Gilgamesh is faster than light and mastered the ability to fly. He also tanked blows from extremely strong Hercules.

Doge:Gilgamesh isn't perfect he is very arrogant. Because he's a villain of course. And Gil is kinda of a douche and always underestimates his opponents. 

Spongebob:Gilgamesh has a hard time controlling the gate of Baylon because there are so many swords he doesn't know how to use them all.

Doge:Even if Gilgamesh is an annoying asshole he is still pretty badass and very OP. Basically Ea does everything for him. Damn I want that weapon.

(Gilgamesh erases Shao Kahn from existance with Ea)

(Gilgamesh hit Griffith with Ea blowing up the planet.)

(Gilgamesh explodes Dio by hitting him Ea)

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